Ebay know what mood you’re in!
Did you know that the systems behind the shopping website Ebay can tell what mood you’re in and there’s an important message here about the mood you project in your everyday life!
Over the summer Ebay let a drinks company test targeted adverts based on information that might indicate your mood. So if you were searching garden furniture and partyware for instance, they would deem you to be in a summery mood and target you with summer drinks adverts. If you use Facebook you might have noticed this too; you mention shoes in conversation and soon after shoe adverts appear in your newsfeed.
Life, other people and bad moods
You can apply a similar principle to every day life; things, people, opportunities and problems respond to the mood you bring to them.
Have you noticed how sometimes a bad start to the day just gets worse, even ordinary things that usually run smoothly get irritatingly problematic just when you’re already having a bad day thank you very much?
It might be useful on those days to stop for a moment and check what mood you’re bringing to the situation. If someone or something has put you in a grump or you’re frustrated about the computer, the car, your partner…has that become a blueprint for your whole day?
There’s an ancient Chinese proverb that says:
“If everywhere you go, you smell sh**, look under your own shoe”.
Which I think is probably neither Chinese nor ancient but a good place to hang our hat and ask this question; is there something I’m bringing to this conversation or task that is souring the mood from the start? And if you suspect there is, you can breathe out the tension and make an intention to come instead from a calm, patient place and see if things improve. If things – or other people – improve as a result then that’s a bonus, at the very least you’ll know you’re not the one bringing the bad mood. And you’ll feel a lot less tense in the process.
Are you stuck on repeat?
It’s amazing how many times we’re repeating the same story, running the same script and wondering why we keep having the same results, from different people, in different circumstances, as if we just have bad luck. But if it seems such a coincidence, maybe there’s something in it. If someone is being dumped repeatedly by a string of partners, there’s an opportunity to check whether they keep choosing the ‘wrong’ person or bringing the same ‘smell’ to the relationship each time. It probably isn’t a run of bad luck, there’s probably a useful message about something we’re repeatedly bringing to the party.
Pimms for summer? Hot chocolate for autumn?
It’s not about blame, it’s about being as wise as those folks who want to sell you a glass of summer Pimms because you’ve just ordered a swimming pool or hot chocolate for the autumn because you’ve just bought a blanket; noticing the mood you’re bringing with you and how that may be attracting reactions from those around you.
Be the mood you want to see
You’ll no doubt spot other people doing this…they blame others for the mood they’re actually bringing on themselves, so we all know how it happens. To completely mangle a Gandhi quote: Be the mood you want to see in the world.
The real gem is spotting it in yourself, and making a positive choice to bring the mood you wish to receive. If others don’t play along and choose to stay grumpy or unhelpful there’s not a lot more we can do about it but at least you can go about your day knowing that if there IS a bad smell, it’s not you. It’s them.
Smell sweet, choose to be kind in your mind and on the outside 🙂
Sending much love to you! (see me choose the mood there!?)